Broken glass

For the past few months, I have closely watched Iris's life unfold. It was like watching fireworks go off. While it was beautiful to watch, I found myself wondering whether it's possible to see any form of beauty in chaos. I just don't know how she did it. Night after night, I heard her weep while she wondered how she was ever going to pick up the pieces. Most importantly, how she was going to carry on with her life after giving him so much of herself. She thought she had come to a dead end, never realizing that life was doing her a favor keeping her away from him.


In a lot of ways, I can understand her pain. She has done the impossible for the past year and a half. She has put up with one of his many horrible mood swings, sacrificed her life, her happiness, and her studies even, all for him. And how does he re-pay her? After recieving 'the' dreaded phonecall she has waited so long for, he informed her that he needs to be alone. You would think she was smothering him or even suffocating him, but the truth is far from that. He's a young man spoiled for choice. Secretly, I was happy he had made this decision, but I was hurting for Iris.


It's been a while, and I decided to meet Iris this morning for a cup of coffee. She seemed a lot happier and comfortable right now. It was a refreshing change to witness. She has also started to see benefits of this young man's decision. She told me that she doesn't live in fear anymore. In the past, she was far from happy because she secretly waited for him to drop that bomb he was hiding from her - the bomb he wanted to drop only when he was ready. Imagine being in a relationship where you were always living in fear, knowing in the back of your head that something lurked just around the corner and you had no idea when it was going to make its nasty appearance. That's how Iris felt for the last year and a half.


We spoke for hours. She is looking forward to a future. She is doing her school work like she should and also trying to slowly get back in touch with the friends she has lost. In other words, she is trying to piece her life back together. Out of curioisity, I asked her if they are still in contact. She paused for a few seconds before answering that they were. Stupid girl, I thought. She told me how she wants to move on, but that he's not letting her. From what I gathered, he's keeping her as back-up perhaps. He wants to keep the door slightly open, just in case he will need to creep back in again. I warned her and I do hope she takes my advice into consideration. I do not want him to take her for an idiot.


For now, at least she's a little more happy. You can see the color creeping back into her once pale skin. She looks healthier and her apettite seems to be back. Although I do have a lot of worries, I am glad that for now, she's on the road to recovery and will not get involved with anyone until she's emotionally ready and strong. I like that Iris girl, she's really nice and I wish her all the best.


"...Don't be reckless with other's people's hearts, and don't put up with people who are reckless with yours."




PS. I have to try and update more often.